Mark the peril reindeer fight.
In the air, on Christmas night.
Everywhere we mobilize?
There are no more friendly skies.
Terrorists prep R.P.G.'s.
Rare or weaponized disease.
Blitzen, Dancer and our fleet:
Fritzin' that Santa's packing heat.
Hits a nerve of reindeer stress.
What we must swerve.
It's such a mess.


Arctic life was oh so nice.
Warmth amid the snow and ice.
Mrs. Claus's Christmas scene house
Is a red house …
and a greenhouse.
Which may melt all those who froze.
And have you felt Rudolph's nose?
So we go from cold to cooled.
As we North Poled
Become North Pooled.
Grim, the state of reindeer stressed.
Imminent fate:
Remain depressed.


Darkly deep we reindeer think.
So we keep a reindeer shrink,
And masseuse on full-time call.
Prozac use?
Up overall.
We could quit, but who'd deliver?
Who'd commit to be the giver?
Yuletide drive: our sacred trust!
But to survive, we must adjust.
Stark consultants to address
All the tumult that we assess.
Hark, the shocks of reindeer stress.
We are in talks with U.P.S.

 
Janis Liebhart - lead vocal; background vocals
Greg Hilfman - music director
 

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